After my weigh-in and measurements last Wednesday (11/21), I had nine pounds left to lose to meet my first HUGE goal before I go to my parents' place for Christmas. After talking to my sister on the phone on Thanksgiving, we decided to compete to see who can lose the highest percentage of their weight this holiday season. Our official weigh-in for the competition was yesterday, and guess what? Since last Wednesday, I've lost three pounds! Of course I had a whoops today and had pizza, but I am doing a double gym day tomorrow. Also, I did my first double double at the gym: I ran two laps twice. Matt was really excited that I wanted to push through it. I think he would have been even more excited if I did one triple, but I already told him that'll have to happen after the holidays. We'll see!
I feel like if I reach my goal, my time at my parents' place and Tammy's pad will be easier because I will NEVER want to go over that number again (I will no longer hide how much I weigh at this point). Besides, I was always competitive with my sister, wanting to do better than her, so that's just added motivation! Let's not forget that Matt's supposed to take me out when I hit it as well! Looks like I'll be working my butt off tomorrow to pay for the pizza bit today...
(A mental note to me, I feel WAY too full right now, and I'm not liking it one bit.)
Monday, November 26, 2007
Sunday, November 25, 2007
To Love...
On September 26, 2007, I shared with you a passage (1 John 4: 16-19) that I had been studying to address my issue with fears. This past week, God hit me from the back of the head and said "You have it all wrong," and He reminded me of the few verses after what I had quoted last time. Here's 1 John 4: 16-21.
I have known for awhile that I did not know how to show my love for others, and sometimes I even questioned if I actually loved anybody. As defined by Merriam-Webster, to love is "to hold dear: cherish." If I take this one step further, to cherish is "to feel or show affection for, to nurture."
I have a hard time giving love. To give love means I may not receive it back, and honestly, this scares the crap out of me. I have recently gone through a very childish phase where I thought the world should revolve around me. People should get to know me because I'm a good person. People should want to be my friend; I should not have to seek their friendship. I expected life to be handed to me on a platter. It was all about me.
I have a hard time receiving love. Honestly, I sometimes feel like I am not a good enough person to get the time and attention I occasionally get. I really do not like accepting somebody else's generosity. When Matt offered to help me when he didn't have to, he looked directly into my eyes and said he wanted to. He wanted to see me reach my potential. I am truly humbled (to tears) by those who are completely generous mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I wish, hope, and pray to be the same some day.
Back to the passage. How can I live in God when I cannot live in love? Friends do things for one another without question. Friends do things for one another without ulterior motives. Friends do things (even things they don't want to sometimes) for one another because they love each other.
There is no fear in love. I am really at peace with this verse. How can I fear weight loss when I have such deep-rooted friendships that will not change even if I do? If anything, these friends will keep me in check. And if the friendships don't last, they were obviously not made in love, so it will weed out my true friends. All I can do is improve and become better and greater than what I once was.
For those faithful friends (family is included in the definition of friend) who have been by my side this whole time - thank you. I keep telling myself I need to be a better friend, and I will be from now on. By the grace of God, I know how to love and open my heart.
(16)And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. (17)In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgement, because in this world we are like him. (18)There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.
(19)We love because he first loved us. (20)If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. (21)And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother.
I have known for awhile that I did not know how to show my love for others, and sometimes I even questioned if I actually loved anybody. As defined by Merriam-Webster, to love is "to hold dear: cherish." If I take this one step further, to cherish is "to feel or show affection for, to nurture."
I have a hard time giving love. To give love means I may not receive it back, and honestly, this scares the crap out of me. I have recently gone through a very childish phase where I thought the world should revolve around me. People should get to know me because I'm a good person. People should want to be my friend; I should not have to seek their friendship. I expected life to be handed to me on a platter. It was all about me.
I have a hard time receiving love. Honestly, I sometimes feel like I am not a good enough person to get the time and attention I occasionally get. I really do not like accepting somebody else's generosity. When Matt offered to help me when he didn't have to, he looked directly into my eyes and said he wanted to. He wanted to see me reach my potential. I am truly humbled (to tears) by those who are completely generous mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I wish, hope, and pray to be the same some day.
Back to the passage. How can I live in God when I cannot live in love? Friends do things for one another without question. Friends do things for one another without ulterior motives. Friends do things (even things they don't want to sometimes) for one another because they love each other.
There is no fear in love. I am really at peace with this verse. How can I fear weight loss when I have such deep-rooted friendships that will not change even if I do? If anything, these friends will keep me in check. And if the friendships don't last, they were obviously not made in love, so it will weed out my true friends. All I can do is improve and become better and greater than what I once was.
For those faithful friends (family is included in the definition of friend) who have been by my side this whole time - thank you. I keep telling myself I need to be a better friend, and I will be from now on. By the grace of God, I know how to love and open my heart.
Saturday, November 24, 2007
Pat Monahan Concert
Last Friday (11/16) I went to the Pat Monahan concert at La Zona which is located on 4th Street in downtown Austin. I found out that day he was going to be playing in town, and I called Laura immediately to see if she wanted to go. For those of you who don't remember him, he was the lead singer of Train, but has gone solo. Currently, his huge hit is "Her Eyes." Anyway, the concert was FANTASTIC! Only a couple hundred people showed up at the venue. He played for an hour and a half, and did "Always Midnight" without the microphone, which stole my breathe. He sounds better in person than on the radio, believe it or not. He did a few of his popular hits from the Train days as well.
After the concert, Laura and I went for a drink at Lavaca Street Bar, one of my favorite laid-back bars in downtown. It's a building that opens up to the street so that on nice nights, it almost feels like you're outside, but still inside at the bar. She requested that we sit down since she was on her feet all day, so we grabbed a table by the opening to outside. We were chatting about life, catching up since we didn't see each other in six weeks and were watching the Pistons game. This group of guys walk by on the street, and I couldn't help but notice them. (I'm single, what can I say.) I look at one of the directly, and he looked EXTREMELY familiar, and he looked back at me with the same expression. Finally it hits us, we know each other from the gym. Gene comes over and gives me a quick hug over the railing and goes on his way. Well, Gene is a trainer at my gym who is pretty good friends with my trainer. I thought about it and wondered if he was going to mention seeing me downtown to Matt or if he'd be cool about it like Scotty was in the grocery store...
I hit the gym on Saturday and was talking to Christina, a newer trainer, and I found out that because they had a great sales day, the company rented out a bar for them that evening downtown. I had an eerie feeling that Gene may accidentally tell Matt about the previous night...
On Monday, when I met with Matt, I was going to bust him for getting drunk on Saturday night and him not telling me about the party. WELL...he busted me first by saying "So I hear you were out on the town Friday night..." Let's just say I gave Gene a hard time about him not being able to keep his trap shut. It was more due to principle: I should be telling Matt when I go off my plan, not people I run into in the course of a night. AND, I was drinking what Matt kept telling me to drink if I do drink: Vodka and Diet Coke. Anyway, to find out, Matt and Gene did some "warm-up" drinking at Lavaca Street Bar before going to the company party, and it was probably the place association (and a few drinks) that made Gene spill the beans.
As I have said previously...trainers trainers everywhere...I can't get away from them.
After the concert, Laura and I went for a drink at Lavaca Street Bar, one of my favorite laid-back bars in downtown. It's a building that opens up to the street so that on nice nights, it almost feels like you're outside, but still inside at the bar. She requested that we sit down since she was on her feet all day, so we grabbed a table by the opening to outside. We were chatting about life, catching up since we didn't see each other in six weeks and were watching the Pistons game. This group of guys walk by on the street, and I couldn't help but notice them. (I'm single, what can I say.) I look at one of the directly, and he looked EXTREMELY familiar, and he looked back at me with the same expression. Finally it hits us, we know each other from the gym. Gene comes over and gives me a quick hug over the railing and goes on his way. Well, Gene is a trainer at my gym who is pretty good friends with my trainer. I thought about it and wondered if he was going to mention seeing me downtown to Matt or if he'd be cool about it like Scotty was in the grocery store...
I hit the gym on Saturday and was talking to Christina, a newer trainer, and I found out that because they had a great sales day, the company rented out a bar for them that evening downtown. I had an eerie feeling that Gene may accidentally tell Matt about the previous night...
On Monday, when I met with Matt, I was going to bust him for getting drunk on Saturday night and him not telling me about the party. WELL...he busted me first by saying "So I hear you were out on the town Friday night..." Let's just say I gave Gene a hard time about him not being able to keep his trap shut. It was more due to principle: I should be telling Matt when I go off my plan, not people I run into in the course of a night. AND, I was drinking what Matt kept telling me to drink if I do drink: Vodka and Diet Coke. Anyway, to find out, Matt and Gene did some "warm-up" drinking at Lavaca Street Bar before going to the company party, and it was probably the place association (and a few drinks) that made Gene spill the beans.
As I have said previously...trainers trainers everywhere...I can't get away from them.
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